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Gary Frisch / Swordfish Communications
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Ashley Madison Data Dump is Worst Nightmare Realized for Cheaters
N.J. Social Worker and Matrimonial Lawyer Provides Tips to Help the Cheated-On Move On
*** Theresa A. Lyons is Immediately Available for Interviews ***
SOMERVILLE, N.J., Aug. 19, 2015 – Hackers made good on their threat and Tuesday posted online 9.7 gigabytes of data on Ashley Madison subscribers, including names, addresses, e-mail addresses and details of personal profiles. The fall-out could be massive, as up to 32 million users of the site, marketed as the premier dating site for married people, have apparently been outed on the anonymous web browser Tor.
For the innocent spouses, this isn’t just a news headline, but a potentially life-altering cataclysm. They’ll need to take steps, right away, to protect their personal interests, insulate their children to the extent possible, and start to rebuild their marriages or their lives. Theresa A. Lyons, a licensed social worker and principal of Lyons & Associates, a matrimonial law firm in New Jersey, offers the following tips. Lyons is also available for interview immediately.
- Determine the Level of Cheating – Some people may be more able to forgive their spouse for a single drunken “one night stand” as opposed to a long-term relationship that exists over months or years, or multiple “one night stands” that happen with many different people. It is also important to know the level of your spouse’s infidelity because that can give insight into whether and what types of physical risks (STDs and the like) the innocent spouse might face or need treatment for.
- Assess Whether Your Marriage Can Be Saved – Up to 80 percent of all marriage counseling fails, not because people don’t want to save their marriages, but because people have unrealistic expectations when participating in marriage therapy. After cheating, the question is not whether your marriage will be the same – it will never be the same. Instead, the question is whether a new marriage can be forged in which both parties can enjoy enough satisfaction to keep the marriage going.
- Shield Your Children from the Conflict – Studies show that the number one factor that determines whether children grow into happy healthy adults is whether their parents can effectively co-parent, even in the face of marital strife. It is not your children’s fault that one spouse has decided to stray. Kids need and deserve stability. And while it usually is not a good idea to lie to your children (especially older children who can more easily ferret out the truth), it usually is a good idea to keep children as protected as possible from parental conflict.
- Have a Solid Plan B – Just in case your marriage can’t be saved, it is important that you get your ducks in a row regarding finances, children, support systems, and personal property. Being blindsided and finding out that your spouse has had an affair is bad enough. To get blindsided during the divorce process would be a double whammy.
Theresa A. Lyons holds a master’s degree in social work from Rutgers University. A certified matrimonial attorney, she has clerked for the Supreme Court of New Jersey and is admitted to practice in the United States Supreme Court. She is managing partner at Lyons & Associates in Somerville. Lyons is also author of the bestselling book, Sticks and Stones: Life Lessons From a Lawyer, which is available at Amazon.com. For more information about Lyons & Associates, P.C., and its family law practice, go to www.lyonspc.com.
To request an interview with Theresa Lyons, Esq. on this or other family law issues, contact Gary Frisch at Swordfish Communications, firstname.lastname@example.org or 856-767-7772, or call Lyons directly at:
For a high-resolution headshot of Theresa Lyons, click here.